The Beginners Guide To Resources (Getting Started 101)

Pertinent Questions in Dating and Sexual Health

We all enjoy those first few weeks of meeting and dating someone New. You can’t quit asking questions about each other, and they’re constantly in your mind. You want to get new ways of spending time together, and there is the potential of sex. Nonetheless, it is advisable to know the individual beyond the sexual chemistry you’ve got with them. You ought to find out that they have been before you began dating them. It’d be wonderful to be able to experience each other without needing to consider the dreaded sexual conversation. This is a talk that lots of people do not like having for a number of reasons. Some individuals think that it is nosy to ask such questions of someone they do not know much and at times, you just do not want to destroy the sex vibe. Although this is clear; you do not want to get a sexually transmitted disease from a new person.

It is tough to have this talk, but for the sake of your safety and sexual health and for other relationships you might have in future, it is an essential conversation to have. So how can you initiate such a dialogue? You can read much more about this in this guide to protect yourself.

As STDs are transmitted not only through the genitals but also through fluids such as saliva, it is crucial to be careful and as ask as many questions as you can of your new prospective partner. This will help you in making an informed choice about how far you want to proceed with them sexually.

The way this conversation happens depends on the personality of the people involved. Some folks are more direct than the rest in regards to those things. Be sure not to be judgmental whether you want to hold the dialogue in person, through the telephone or texts. Reacting in a negative manner can make some partners close down and they won’t be comfortable sharing any info in any way.

Inquiring if the individual has STDs is one of the very important questions to ask to be sure that you are prioritizing your sexual health. For many people, acquiring an STD isn’t a deal breaker since they may take some precautions even with life-altering STDs to lessen the probability of transmission from one individual to another.

The last time they had sex with someone else is another crucial question to ask. Also know if they’ve gone for testing since that time. The replies to these questions will aid you in deciding whether to ask them to undergo testing prior to engaging in sexual contact with them.

In case you ask the few questions above, then you can have the peace of mind to enjoy the fun and intimacy that comes with dating.

What Has Changed Recently With Resources?

Why You Should Get Marriage Counseling Services.

Every person hopes that after marriage everything will go as planned. Even with the best intentions at heart, not every marriage works out well. According to research, many people get married without coming up with means for dealing with the challenges common in married life. Neither partner wants to back down during arguments and bringing in a neutral person is a smart move and marriage counselors do the work the best.
There are people who go to a therapist when their marriage is beyond saving and it is not advisable to wait until things have gotten out of hand completely to seek the services. Couples should know the right time to seek the advice of a neutral person. The easiest way to tell that they are problems which can only be solved by your marriage therapists is lack of communication between you and your partner. Lack of communication is one of the vices that lead to problems between married couples and it is bad that many are not able to realize this early enough. You should not use money as an excuse for not seeking these services because couple couselling Austin is not that expensive. Also, go to an infedility counselor Austin in case of cheating.

Talking to each other is not just for the sake of doing it but you should also consider what you are saying and if it is on the negative side consult a therapist. If one of the partners is always getting a negative backlash he or she will be insecure, ashamed and this makes him or her withdrawn because of being disregarded.

Negative communication will also include the tone of your voice when you’re talking to your partner which means it is not just what is said but also how you say it. Make sure you get the help of a therapist if you’re even afraid to talk to your partner about the issues which are bothering you. There are many minor things in marriage which can make you afraid of talking to your partner ranging from sexual practices and money to the little habits your partner is used to. At the therapists’ office, the feelings of each partner will be aired and the issues you are afraid of talking about analyzed to help you understand the best way of handling them.
There are people who opt to withhold affection towards their partners in order to punish them. This is wrong in many ways and if it is something you are going through or you are doing to your significant other you need to get the help of a marriage counselor.

The Essential Laws of Secrets Explained

Working through the Issues in a Marriage in a Healthy Manner For a relationship to work effectively, the couple should always consider counseling. It is rare for a couple to have the right skills for resolving the major issues in a marriage. When one of the partner has been unhappy in a marriage for a long period of time, resentment is likely to arise. When resentment is high, there are high chances that divorce might ensue along the way. Accordingly, it is always advisable to work all the issues in a marriage at the earliest possible opportunity. For those in a marriage, voicing unhappiness is very important. Hoping that the major issues in the marriage will change along the way is not the right approach. To improve the odds of a marriage to succeed, a person should talk with a professional. The ideal marriage counselor should be experienced. It is always important to consider the academic background of the marriage counselor well in advance. There are some fundamental skills needed to maintain a marriage. In the absence of some skills, it will be hard for a couple to resolve the most salient problems in a marriage. By approaching a marriage counselor, the couple will be equipped with new ways of solving the problems. To attain new perspectives of dealing with the major issues in a marriage, it is advisable to consult with a marriage counselor. By hiring a marriage counselor, a couple will attain numerous benefits. First and foremost, the couple will be taught how to deal with issues in a healthy manner.
5 Takeaways That I Learned About Dating
Most marriage counselors will take the time to teach the couple about how to enhance their communication skills. A number of people fail to listen to the issues of their spouse promptly. The inability to process the statements of a spouse is a major problem in most marriages today. By consulting with a marriage counselor, communicating needs will be much easier. When communicating their needs in a relationship, most people are likely to have a lot of resentment. The chances that a dispute will be resolved will be minimal when there is resentment. The chances that a dispute will be resolved will be reduced when there is anger.
The 10 Best Resources For Relationships
By being assertive, there are high chances that disputes in a marriage will be dealt with. It is not a good idea to offend one of the partners in a marriage. Handling the unresolved issues in a marriage in a competent manner is very important. Indeed, it is always important to nip new issues in the bud. To reduce the frequency of arguments in a relationship, the couple should consider consulting with a marriage counselor. To make arguments less intense in a marriage, the couple should talk with a marriage counselor. To rekindle the lost intimacy in a marriage, a couple should consider talking with a marriage counselor.

Secrets Tips for The Average Joe

A Better Way to Handle Your Relationship In today’s world, nothing is more important than having a loving relationship. As you may imagine, your relationship can have a profound influence on the quality of your life. As you are no doubt aware, though, maintaining a relationship can be very difficult. Every relationship is unique, but some problems are inevitable. If your relationship isn’t doing well, you’ll want to seek advice. By working with a counselor, you can get the help that you need to improve the situation. As you may imagine, however, no two counselors are ever the same. It’s up to you to find a counselor who meets your particular demands. If you’re serious about finding a good counselor, it’s important to define your own expectations. Experience is very important here. As you are no doubt aware, giving relationship advice can be very difficult. It’s crucial that you find a counselor who has real skill and experience. The next step in the process is to consider price. It should be stated that relationship advice does not need to cost a great deal of money. As long as you do your homework, you should be able to find a marriage counselor that fits within your budget. You need to know that being in a relationship isn’t easy. Being with someone involves making significant sacrifices. Remember that you need to think carefully about the person that you are with. The truth is that many people are not in good relationships. It’s important for you to be self-sufficient if you want your relationship to go well. You won’t be able to love someone if you are not happy with who you are as a person. If you’re serious about improving your relationship, it only makes sense to work with a marriage counselor.
The Essential Laws of Guides Explained
As you are no doubt aware, communication is an invaluable part of every good relationship. If you want your relationship to be successful, it’s important for you to trust your partner. Remember that these things will not happen on their own. It takes real time and patience to build a trusting relationship. You need to be upfront and honest with your partner about what you expect. Talk to your marriage counselor if you have any questions about this process.
Incredible Lessons I’ve Learned About Tips
It should be stated that some relationships cannot be saved. Sometimes, the best decision that you can make is to get out. The relationship will not get better unless both people are committed to making it work. You should leave any person that does not want to be with you. Get in touch with your marriage counselor if any of this is unclear to you.

What No One Knows About Services

Finding a Reliable Online Counselor

There are a number of factors that you should consider when searching for a good therapist. Ensure that you set aside adequate time so that you can conduct a proper research process. That means that you can learn a lot about a particular professional from the information that you will find on their website. What is more, it is important that you also search for any complaints against your potential therapists so that you can be able to pick only the professional that has a positive reputation. Therefore, ensure that you only choose the professional that has many positive comments from his former customers because that means that he offers good quality services that you can rely on. Additionally, make sure that you rely on word of mouth to find an individual that has the best services. Ensure that you inquire from your friends if they were satisfied with the services that they received from the therapists that they had chosen.

Keep in mind that you ought to determine your needs before you begin to search for a therapist so that your research process can be easy. Make sure that you take your time so that you can avoid making a choice that you will regret. In addition, you should determine the most suitable length of sessions that you are comfortable with. Therefore, guarantee that you take the first counseling sessions so that you can determine if you are comfortable with the particular professional. That indicates that you should not investigate a large number of therapists since that will take a very long time, and also you will use a lot of money.

That indicates that different online therapists offer their services at very different prices depending on a number of elements. There are a number of people that only consider the prices of the services that they want and overlook the importance of all the other factors, which should not be the case. Therefore, you should avoid making a choice based only on the factor of price. You should prepare a number of questions that you intend to ask the various therapists that you are investigating. That means that you will only be able to make a good choice if you have gathered adequate information. Thus, you should ask your potential online counselors the number of years that they have been offering the therapists services. Thus you ought to leave out the ones that have only begun to practice their professionalism in the recent years.

Suggested Article: The 10 Most Unanswered Questions about Services

7 Signs Your Girlfriend Is Taking Advantage of You

When a man loves a girl, he would want to go over mountains and seas for her. Some girls have discovered this and have positioned themselves to take full advantage of it. Sadly, most guys are not aware of this. It often takes another person to realize that the guy is being used. If you are in a relationship, here are seven ways of discovering this for yourself.

1. She does not take no for an answer:

If your girlfriend likes to have her way at all times, it is a sign that she is emotionally blackmailing you. She has studied you and come to realize that you love her. This is now her bargaining weapon. If you have an argument, she would do all she can for you to concede. If that fails, she will resort to tears because she knows it will break you.

2. She wants you to invest heavily in the relationship:

You may ask “What is wrong with it?” Nothing, if only she invests in the same measure. If you are the one always investing in a relationship and she rarely invests in the same manner, bro, she is just enjoying “dividends of a maga”. The simple fact is, if someone loves you, there will be the natural instinct to give all she can. While there is need for reciprocation, true love does not try to get first, instead, it gives.

3. She cancels plans with you repeatedly:

If she is fond of cancelling any plans that you both have made and does so with reckless abandon, watch it. No one who loves you will keep you hanging like that. “But she gives reasons why she couldn’t make it”, you say. Those reasons are excuses, and she gives you because you need something to comfort yourself with. The time and attention she is starving you of is what someone gets with ease.

4. She does not really care about you:

When a girl loves a guy, she wants to tell him everything that is happening with her and also wants to know what is happening with him. If your girlfriend does not show interest in knowing about what is going on with you that is a red flag. Rather than know about your progress with life, she occupies herself with telling you about her needs or family problems and needs, you really need to think twice.

5. You have a desire to gain her approval:

A woman’s desire is what her man should have and not try to earn. If you feel the need to get her to like anything you do or approve of who you are, then you should be careful. If your girlfriend discovers this desire in you, she is supposed to help you address it by telling you she approves of you unconditionally. If she does not but instead feeds that desire, you are not her lover but her worker who is trying hard to earn her approval.

6. She uses sex as a bargaining chip:

It is up to the two of you to decide whether to abstain or have sex. The problem here is if she uses sex as a tool for negotiation. She knows most men will make a decision based on what lies between their legs rather than what is in their head. If she deprives you of intimacy just to have her way, it is clear that she is trying to take advantage of you.

7. She makes you feel guilty:

Guilt is a powerful emotion that most people do not know how to cope with. Your girlfriend too may recognize this and try to use it for her own good. When she needs your presence, she will probably say something like, “I know you don’t miss me anymore, that’s why you don’t hand out with me” or when she needs something, “I know you don’t care about me and how I survive. Later you will say you love me”. If your girl makes statements along these lines, she is trying to get you defensive and then do her bidding. It’s simple reverse psychology!

If you discover you are in this category, it is best you break up with such a girl. Manipulation is a decision and not an accident. That girl is not your girlfriend but a manipulator.

6 Ways To Unlock Her Wild Side

Dear men, we know you want your lady love to crave for you in bed! But please know and understand the fact that women can be tricky: with a lot of buttons to press, and to be pressed in a certain order, at a certain time. Always remember she will never love a guy who just wants to wham, bam, thank you, Ma’am. She will never come crawling back for more with that strategy of yours.

Here is a list of tricks you can try to drive her crazy.

– Foreplay Is A Must!

Jumping straight into sex is never a great idea! Appropriate warm-up leads to smoother action in bed! Just heat up things a little before you get started on the main course! Kissing, biting, teasing and heavy petting, etc. will just have the right effect on her. Just fire her up and watch her turn into a crazy sex kitten in the bedroom! If you are new to this, just whisper something in her ear, bite it a little and suck on it or gently draw your finger up her spine as you kiss her, this will certainly ignite her like a firecracker.

– Watch Out For Her Body Signs!

Women are very expressive, even when they are not talking, their body has a lot to say! You want to know if she’s enjoying herself or not? Just read and understand her body language. Along with that what you should really be taking care of is what really makes her hips grind, how badly she want you, how much she forces her body in yours, and how intense her breathing is, etc. and react to this appropriately. The most important thing is to remain confident and full of passion. Never be the guy who doesn’t have a clue of what he’s doing or has no faith in himself, cause it is such a turn-off!

– Be The Man She Wants!

In the world full of empowering women all around, one might get used to women taking control in bed. And believe us you’ll love it when she is in charge and dominating you, there’s nothing better! But always remember even a confident, powerful and ballsy woman, simply love being dominated! Let us warn you, it will take a little time, trust and communication to win her over! Take baby steps and pick up hints from by reading her body language to make sure she’s comfortable, both physically and emotionally. Go with the thumb rule of one step at a time, it is never a good idea to start off with anything that might hurt her feelings or humiliate her. Women are really drawn towards a man who can take charge and show his dominance and doesn’t think twice before pinning her up against the wall or might as well catch hold of her and punish her by spanking her ass! This is a massive turn on for most women.

– Make Her Go Head Over Heels!

Women are very sensitive and conscious about their lady parts, so assure her you’re having a great time down there. Give her head, she will go in a different world altogether! One strict no while giving a head is “not to take advice from porn video” Believe us, she is not that easy to win over! In the initial stage, this might seem a little tough but with time and patience, you will be a pro in no time!

– Hit The Right Spot!

There are a lot of switches in a women’s body which will fire up the minute you turn it on! Starting with the clitoris, g-spot, nipples, the neck, her lips, her back, etc. are a list of switches that you can keep in mind to get her started! Keep on trying new spots to play with because unless she actually tells you, you’ll never know what really floats her boat. Sometimes you’ll get lucky by redefining her choices, only if you keep on experimenting with her! Just blindfold her and roll an ice cube over her neck and lips and drag it all the way down there and let the magic work!

– Play Hard And Rough!

That was a different time when women were all delicate and were handled with care in bed! Though vanilla still is chosen by a lot of women, going wild and rough is that sweeps a whole lot of women off their feet! Maybe she doesn’t need a knight in shining armor but a bandit indeed! Please remember, she is not glass and she won’t break easily, so don’t worry about hurting her. She is crazy, impulsive and just needs you to tame her! Rough love making in bed is full of passion, animalistic and it will sure as hell drive her wild. So don’t hesitant to get a little kinky with her either.

The Challenge of Relationships for Those on a Spiritual Journey

I’m sure if you are reading this, you are what is called a ‘lightworker’. Lightworkers are people that come to earth with a spiritual purpose: service to others, bettering the planet, healing, beautifying the planet, challenging current beliefs for the growth of humans etc.

Lightworkers of today, can find relationships very confounding. This comes down to one word—vows.

Lightworkers have had many past lives in the spiritual realms as members of the clergy, monks, nuns, priests, gurus, healers, sages, missionaries, etc. They naturally tend to put others first, sacrifice themselves in service to others, and are often of humble means.

This relates to ingrained vows from the past including: vows of chastity, poverty, hunger (fasting), humility, isolation, and selfless service (often martyrdom).

Say the following sentences out loud, “I want a lot of money”, “I want fame,” “I’m out for myself,” “All I have to do is worry about getting what I want,” “I want to be rich, powerful, have an entourage, and be a player” or things to that affect, do you have a strong reaction? Do you hear a voice screaming “Noooooooo!”

Did you feel judgment over coveting these ‘worldly things’? If yes, then you are likely here on a spiritual mission. In the past, these hedonistic things would have been ‘temptations’ to resist, things to tempt you off your path, things that would shake your humility and move you further away from God.

Needless to say, having an aversion to earthly pleasures, is not altogether helpful in current times. It is not wrong or anti-spiritual to want love, security, money, joy, creature comforts, or even material possessions, if you are not driven by greed. These things allow us to take care of ourselves.

The modern world is driven by competition and acquisition, and these qualities in the extreme, can make you vulnerable to opportunists.

It is then, hardly a surprise that many light-workers have difficulty with relationships. They haven’t had a lot of experience with them, so it is new territory. They may not even give themselves permission to have relationships, much less those where someone is giving to them.

Modern society breeds narcissists. If you are conditioned by society to believe your only two choices in life are to be a have or a have not, your goal will probably be to collect, and not share, as many toys as you can. Some people are here in service to self, and others are here in service to others. The two can be put together, but like oil and water, they don’t mix.

If you find out a person’s values before you get involved (listening to red flags is hard, but vital), you will save yourself a lot of wasted time and heartbreak. If you ask, “What do you feel your life purpose is?” and they answer, “To have as much fun as possible,” or “To be rich and famous,” you know who you are dealing with.

The traps that can make you vulnerable to predatory people are:
Compulsive care taking
Putting your partners’ needs before your own
Putting other peoples’ feelings before your own
Being manipulated into doing more or all of the work in the relationship
Trying to fix or heal someone who is broken (they can sniff “fixers” out like sharks)
Being overly understanding and making excuses for your partner’s bad behavior
Being more tolerant of poor treatment than others
Lacking confidence due to being taken advantage of
Being more comfortable giving than receiving
Difficulty being vulnerable
Difficulty asking others for help
Doing way too much for other people without realizing it
Doing things for others at your own detriment
Letting people drain you
Minimizing how much you do for others
Difficulty with boundaries in personal relationships
Having a hard time setting limits and saying no
Being overly self sufficient
Not expecting anything from others (which is exactly what you get if you do not assert yourself)
Doing things for others they can, and should, do for themselves

This is by no means a complete list. Psychiatry would say these reflect subconscious patterns being re-enacted based on your childhood experiences. I would call them karma from past lives based on core issues you are trying to learn in this lifetime.

For many, their core issue is self-love, self-care, and figuring out how to have a healthy, loving relationship based on equality, not need.

If you are in a relationship where you feel more like a parent than a partner, you are fulfilling what I will call, “the pattern”.

The good news is that you can change this. Take the power back by realizing you created the perfect conditions for someone to mistreat you. Having awareness is the first step. It will be hard. You WILL fall into the pattern again, but hopefully, and gradually, it will take you less and less time to realize it.

Learn not to make bad investments. Lightworkers tend to fully invest in people and things that amount to a terrible business deal. Investing in something that has poor prospects for the future, produces low dividends, diminishes your resources, and leaves you bankrupt, is a bad deal.

Try not to take detours on the way to obtaining your goals. Invest in yourself. Toxic people will make you your own collateral damage. Can you afford that? Those truly capable of loving and caring for you, will appreciate you for who you are, not only for what you do for them.

I am a professional psychic medium with 20+ years of experience. Please feel free to visit my web site, where you will find a free meditation, and info about classes and workshops in Psychic Development.

Your Invitation Has an Expiration Date

An invitation is a written or verbal request inviting someone to go somewhere or to do something. Have you ever been invited to something like a wedding or a bridal shower? Do you remember that your invitation had an RSVP date? What the invitation really meant was, your presence at the event would be appreciated, but you have to respond by the stated date. Otherwise, it is assumed you are uninterested or unavailable, and you’d not be included in the count.

Here’s another example. Manufacturers are in business to make money, and their target market is the public. After all, if we don’t buy their products, what will they do with them, and how would they earn a living? It is common knowledge that competition is fierce among manufacturers, so many of them use all kinds of advertisements to draw sales away from their competitors.

One of the strategies they use is price reduction –commonly known as sales — and another one is coupons use. What’s interesting about both strategies is that both are dated: they have expiration dates, forcing the buyer to purchase products by the specified deadline. If products are not purchased by the expiration dates, the discounts no longer apply and one has to pay full price for the products in question.
I don’t know about you, but I feel like I’ve thrown money away when I let a coupon expire, yet I misplace them all the time or forget that I even have them. In other words, I don’t treat coupons as if they are as valuable as I say they are. Fortunately, the products will probably still be available, whether or not there’s a sale or coupon. I will just have to pay a bit more.

God loves us and would like us to respond to Him. Although we are unaware of a specific date, God’s invitation into a relationship with Him has a time limit as well. That date is not readily available as one might see on coupons, but I can assure you, your invitation to come to God expires when you die, or when Jesus returns to earth, whichever comes first. The Bible says so. God knows when, but we don’t, and that is why each person needs to take this invitation seriously and treat it with urgency. It is better to have the assurance now that God has a place for you in heaven, than get to the end only to find your name is not on the list. What a disappointment and loss that would be!

Having explained time limits, let me explain God’s invitation again. Through the disobedience of Adam and Eve, our first parents, sin was passed on to us. That sin caused a separation between God and man. In order to restore that relationship, Jesus died to pay the price for our sin. God’s love through the death of His Son, Jesus, is enough to cover every single person, but each person has to choose what they want. God will not force salvation on anyone, neither is He going to wait forever while people toil with the idea of loving God or something else. People have to take responsibility for their sins and make plans for their eternal future.

Living now without faith in Jesus means living in eternity later without God, and that means spending eternity in hell. Using the word hell is not a scare tactic; it is the truth, and should be addressed as such. Sugar-coating it or calling it by any other name won’t change what it is. Jesus’ invitation to you is, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me” (John 14:6 NLT).

How are you going to respond to this invitation? Time is running out with every day that passes. You probably don’t have as much time as you think. This is God’s assurance when you repent and put your faith in Jesus, “Everyone who believes that Jesus is the Christ has become a child of God” (1 John 5:1 NLT), and “I have written this to you who believe in the name of the Son of God, so that you may know you have eternal life” (1 John 5:13 NLT). Respond to this invitation, before it’s too late for you!

Is Empathy Important In A Relationship?

If one lived in the middle of nowhere and there was no one else in sight, they might not need to think about anyone else. The only thing they would need to think about is their own needs, and their life would be based around fulfilling these needs.

Yet, if it isn’t this black and white, it could mean that they have a dog that they have to look after. But even if they have a dog, this is not going to be something that will consume their life.


In addition to what they have to do for their dog, there can be what they have to do to the land around them. If they take care of the land, it can allow them to grow the kind of food that they need in order to survive.

This is then going to mean that they will have a few things to focus on and, when they are not focusing on these things, they can think about themselves. This is going to be radically different to how it would be if one spent time around others.

Reaching Out

When one spends time around someone, it is going to be important for them to make sure they are not caught up with their own needs. One is then not going to be consumed with what is taking place within them; they will be aware of what is going on for the other person.

Through extending themselves in this way, it allows them to bridge the gap that exists between them. As a result of this, it will allow one to connect to the other person and to put themselves to one side.


This is going to cause one to come across as though they are interested in what the other person has to say. Thus, not only will one’s body be there; their presence will also be there.

And as they are able to tune into what the other person is going through, it is going to be a lot easier for them to know what they need. Through being aware of the signals that the other person is giving out, one will know how to respond.

Another Approach

But even if one is not aware of what someone needs, it doesn’t mean that they won’t know what to do. The only thing that one will need to do is to ask them what it is that they can do for them.

What matters is that one is able to notice that someone isn’t right and, from here, something can be done about it. It is then going to be clear to the other person that one cares about them.

Both Ways

When one behaves in this way and the person they are with also behaves in the same way, it can allow them to have a strong connection. And, it won’t matter if one is spending time with a friend, a family member, or their partner, for instance, as it is always going to be important for them to be this way.

One could find that if they were to behave in this way around someone they don’t know they could soon end up with a new friend. The other person could see that one is interested in their needs, and this could draw them in.

Always a Way

When one is in a relationship with someone who has empathy, it is going to be a lot easier for them to work through any challenges that arise. Firstly, both of them will have the ability to see when something isn’t right.

Through putting themselves in the other person’s shoes, they will be able to get an idea of what the other is going though. From here, they will be able to apologise, or change their behaviour in some way.

In Balance

What this is going to show that is that one has the ability to give and they have the ability to receive. And as one is an interdependent human being, this is going to make it a lot easier for them to thrive.

It is through one being there for others that other people will be there for them. There may have been a time when one was there for others but they didn’t return the favour, and this could have shown that one didn’t value themselves, amongst other things.

Another Experience

But even though it is important to have empathy, it doesn’t mean that everyone has it, or that everyone has the same amount. So, if one lacks empathy, their experience on this earth is going to be extremely different.

When one is focused on their own needs and they are not interested in what is going on for other people, they could believe that other people exist to meet their needs. It is then going to be as if these people are an extension of them.

Take and Take

This is likely to mean that they won’t have any friends, or if they do, they can be surrounded by people who are also out of balance. These people could have the tendency to focus on other people’s needs, and they could believe that their needs are not important.

One is then going to take what they can, and these people will just put up with it. It could seem as though one doesn’t have the ability to put themselves in another person’s shoes.

One Option

So if one is in a relationship, for instance, and their partner had a problem, they are not going to be able to be there for them. One could end up telling them to ‘get over’ it or to ‘move on’.

This can then cause their partner to feel invalidated and as though one doesn’t care about them. If there is a problem in their relationship, it is highly unlikely that it will get any better; in fact, it could end up getting even worse.


If one is caught up with their own needs and finds it hard to empathise with others, it will be vital for them to work on this, that’s if they feel the need to. And if one is used to attracting people who are self-centred, it is going to be necessary for them to look into why they put up with these people.

As if they valued themselves, they might no longer be drawn to (or attract) these kinds of people. The assistance of a therapist or a healer may be needed here.

Prolific writer, author, and coach, Oliver JR Cooper, hails from England. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation, including love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over one thousand three hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behaviour, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice. His current projects include ‘A Dialogue With The Heart’ and ‘Communication Made Easy’.