When a man loves a girl, he would want to go over mountains and seas for her. Some girls have discovered this and have positioned themselves to take full advantage of it. Sadly, most guys are not aware of this. It often takes another person to realize that the guy is being used. If you are in a relationship, here are seven ways of discovering this for yourself.
1. She does not take no for an answer:
If your girlfriend likes to have her way at all times, it is a sign that she is emotionally blackmailing you. She has studied you and come to realize that you love her. This is now her bargaining weapon. If you have an argument, she would do all she can for you to concede. If that fails, she will resort to tears because she knows it will break you.
2. She wants you to invest heavily in the relationship:
You may ask “What is wrong with it?” Nothing, if only she invests in the same measure. If you are the one always investing in a relationship and she rarely invests in the same manner, bro, she is just enjoying “dividends of a maga”. The simple fact is, if someone loves you, there will be the natural instinct to give all she can. While there is need for reciprocation, true love does not try to get first, instead, it gives.
3. She cancels plans with you repeatedly:
If she is fond of cancelling any plans that you both have made and does so with reckless abandon, watch it. No one who loves you will keep you hanging like that. “But she gives reasons why she couldn’t make it”, you say. Those reasons are excuses, and she gives you because you need something to comfort yourself with. The time and attention she is starving you of is what someone gets with ease.
4. She does not really care about you:
When a girl loves a guy, she wants to tell him everything that is happening with her and also wants to know what is happening with him. If your girlfriend does not show interest in knowing about what is going on with you that is a red flag. Rather than know about your progress with life, she occupies herself with telling you about her needs or family problems and needs, you really need to think twice.
5. You have a desire to gain her approval:
A woman’s desire is what her man should have and not try to earn. If you feel the need to get her to like anything you do or approve of who you are, then you should be careful. If your girlfriend discovers this desire in you, she is supposed to help you address it by telling you she approves of you unconditionally. If she does not but instead feeds that desire, you are not her lover but her worker who is trying hard to earn her approval.
6. She uses sex as a bargaining chip:
It is up to the two of you to decide whether to abstain or have sex. The problem here is if she uses sex as a tool for negotiation. She knows most men will make a decision based on what lies between their legs rather than what is in their head. If she deprives you of intimacy just to have her way, it is clear that she is trying to take advantage of you.
7. She makes you feel guilty:
Guilt is a powerful emotion that most people do not know how to cope with. Your girlfriend too may recognize this and try to use it for her own good. When she needs your presence, she will probably say something like, “I know you don’t miss me anymore, that’s why you don’t hand out with me” or when she needs something, “I know you don’t care about me and how I survive. Later you will say you love me”. If your girl makes statements along these lines, she is trying to get you defensive and then do her bidding. It’s simple reverse psychology!
If you discover you are in this category, it is best you break up with such a girl. Manipulation is a decision and not an accident. That girl is not your girlfriend but a manipulator.